Criminally Insane
by AestheticAcoustic
Summary: Set in modern times. Sasori and Deidara as C.S.I.’s. A number of murders have been committed by a criminal duo and it’s up to the C.S.I. team to figure out who they are, why they’re doing it, and how to stop them. SasoDei, mystery couples.
1. The Fox And The Wolf

This is set in modern times and stars Sasori and Deidara as C.S.I.'s. A number of murders have been committed by a criminal duo and it's up to the C.S.I. team to figure out who they are, why they're doing it, and how to stop them.

Better than it sounds, I promise. Has a bit of a twist as well…

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.

_Italics_ – Sort of like what the criminal(s) is (are) seeing/thinking.

Kitsune - fox.

Okami - wolf.

Criminally Insane

* * *

_Tried the door; locked._

_Picked lock; easy._

_Rushed into room; silent as ever._

_Located bedroom; third from the left._

_Injected couple with poison; little effort needed._

A cloaked figure stood silently over the now unconscious couple, waiting for his partner. Soon enough, the older of the two walked through the door way, smirk invisible under the okami mask. The younger quickly left the room and went to the living room, finding a large window and looking out of it at the full moon, kitsune mask hiding his saddened features from prying neighbors.

Only seconds later, the tearing of flesh and clothes could be heard from the bedroom. The man in the kitsune mask quickly covered his ears, hating the horrible sounds and the images they brought to his mind. He never watched the okami man work. It was much too gruesome. He hated blood, violence, and death, but would murder if the okami ever asked. He loved that man with every fiber of his being.

Soon enough, the sounds stopped, and all was silent, save for the soft footsteps heading toward the living room. The kitsune let out a sigh of relief when strong arms wrapped around his waist and loving words were whispered in his ear.

* * *

Sasori let out an annoyed noise as he brought his fist down on the buzzing alarm clock. He rolled over and shook the man sleeping next to him. Deidara groaned and rolled away from the annoyance. The red head sat up. "Deidara, we have work, get up."

"Nnn." Deidara curled into a ball around and under the covers. Sasori silently cursed as he got up and went to the end of the bed. He grabbed the blonde's feet and pulled both Deidara and the sheets off the bed. Deidara grunted when he hit the floor and curled up into a tight ball with the sheets. Sasori sighed. _'It's gonna be a_ long _day…'_

* * *

"Looks like they were poisoned." Sasori stated before taking a picture. Hidan looked over the chest wounds. "And judging from the way they were cut open, I'd say it was the same people." The dead couple lying in bed made victims number 17 and 18 for the Midnight Stalkers. The M.O. was always easy to identify.

The victims always had some kind of criminal activity going. They were poisoned using the liquefied leaves of Bittersweet Nightshade, leaving them paralyzed but aware of everything, cut open from neck to pelvis with a knife, and then their innards were ripped out and thrown into a bloody mass on the floor.

"I'm done in the living room, un." Deidara walked in the room and cringed at the bodies. "Gross…"

* * *

"Damn, you're quick." Hidan stated from his spot in the doorway of the lab. "I'm paid to be." Deidara said cheerfully as he spun in his chair. Sasori reached a hand out and grabbed the chair, successfully stopping the spinning and nearly making the blonde fall from his seat. Said blonde huffed before looking over the papers in his hand.

"Stephawn Millington, 34, and Merylin Waters, 31. Both are immigrants from Europe, un. He's from Great Britain and she's from Italy." Deidara began spinning again. "So, what'd they do to get them killed?" Sasori asked as he stopped the spinning again.

"Will you stop that? The blood swirling in my head helps me think, un." He began spinning once again, much to Sasori's displeasure. "They were drug trafficking for an underground organization, couldn't get the name, and are suspected of killing at least one person for unknown reasons, un."

"Oh great, now we've got the fuckin' yakuza on our asses!" Hidan huffed and rolled his eyes. "And for the love of fucking Jashin, stop fucking spinning!"

"Bite me." Deidara said in a sing-song voice as he spun faster. "Sasori, control your boyfriend."

"He's not my boyfriend!" Sasori snapped, cringing as soon as the words left his mouth. Deidara stopped spinning, a hurt expression on his face. "Sorry… I meant to say, 'shut up Hidan.'" Deidara smiled, easily hiding the fact that he was still hurt. He hated that Sasori made him hide their relationship. Hidan had found out on accident, and now Sasori refused to kiss him anywhere but at home.

* * *

Deidara limply fell onto the bed and didn't move. Sasori crawled onto the bed on top of him and began kissing his exposed neck. "I'm not your boyfriend, remember?" Deidara stated blankly before pulling the covers around him and over his head. "I said I was sorry like thirty times…" Sasori groaned, tugging at the covers. "You know I love you… I just don't want you to get hurt by the things that people will say."

"I know…" Deidara loosened his grip and allowed the older male to pull down the covers. Their lips connected and Deidara rolled onto his back and wrapped his arms around his lover's neck. He opened his mouth enough to allow the dominant male's tongue to slip through and explore memorized territory. He whimpered when Sasori slipped his hands under his shirt and began running them up and down his torso.

They parted and Sasori made quick work of the shirt. He crushed their lips back together and removed the blonde's pants while their tongues mingled. He rubbed at the bulge in Deidara's pants, making him moan. They parted again as Sasori sat up. He stared hungrily down at his prey.

"Bastard, un." Sasori quirked an eyebrow. "I was hoping to actually get some sleep tonight." The red head chuckled. "Don't worry, koibito, I promise you'll get a full night's sleep tomorrow."

* * *

_Found unlocked window; entered house._

_Alarm system; very loud._

_Clipped blue wire; silent._

_Located man; asleep in front of TV._

_Injected poison; slight struggle._

Kitsune found it increasingly difficult to tune out the victims weak moans. Okami finally came in and Kitsune left to wander around the house. He located the bedroom and began looking over the knick-knacks covering the tables and shelves. He picked up a small wolf statue with his gloved hands that reminded him of his Okami. He didn't notice said male walk up behind him as he examined it.

"You like that?"

Kitsune jumped and nearly dropped the piece of art. He shakily nodded, fearing Okami's wrath. He relaxed when a hand lovingly brushed his shoulder. "You can keep it. You know what to do." Okami exited the room to finish his work while Kitsune did some dusting and moved a few things, making it look like nothing had been taken or moved.

* * *

"Chigaru Migami, 45, born in Kiri, moved to Konoha ten years ago, un. Accused of three counts of murder and two of manslaughter; never convicted. Apparently women were often all over him, un."

"And now he's all over his couch and floor."

"You're evil."

"I know." Sasori smirked, "But you love me anyway." Deidara blushed, taken by complete surprise. Sasori didn't like to show signs of affection on public. He was even more surprised when the red head leaned down and softly kissed him, right in front of Hidan! The white haired male snickered at Deidara's expression; a combination of shock, fear, and joy.

"Holy hell!" Everyone jumped and turned. Kisame was standing wide-eyed in the doorway. There was a moment of awkward silence before Kisame began to laugh. "I _knew_ you guys were fucking!"

* * *

Deidara looked up from his mini TV as Kisame walked into the room. "How's the case going?"

"Horrible, un. There's little to no evidence, no suspects, and absolutely no leads."

"Then shouldn't you be trying to gather all that instead of watching talk shows?"

Deidara frowned at Kisame's smart-alecky expression. "I've already tried everything but this. I'm hoping maybe the killers want to brag about what they've done in a way and are on one of the local shows, un. If they are, perhaps they'll reveal something and we can investigate them."

"Oh…" Kisame was slightly disappointed that he was so easily outsmarted. "So… You got anything on them at all?"

"There's two, they always kill criminals, they're always very thorough and leave no evidence, the murders occur around midnight, poison is used to paralyze the victim so their innards can be torn out, un, and they never take anything from the scene."

"Well… at least that's something…"

"It's not enough though! It's so frustrating!"

"Don't worry; I'm sure they'll screw up at some point and you'll bag 'em."

"Thanks, un." Deidara smiled appreciatively as Kisame turned and left. He turned back to his TV in time to see two new people walk on.

_"Let's give a warm welcome to Haku and Zabuza Momochi who need some relationship counseling."_

* * *

I don't think I spelled his last name right… I know I'm supposed to be working on ICSY, but I'm suffering from artist's block and am using this as a way to hopefully clear it up. Sorry it's so short. Review please! They inspire me!


	2. Big Things, Small Packages

Here's the next chapter! Please to be enjoying now!

I don't own Naruto.

* * *

"Hey guys, we got a package." Kisame walked into the break room, a large paper-wrapped box in his arms. He sat it on the table and Sasori and Deidara wondered over to see it. Deidara stopped and cocked his head. "What's that noise?" Sasori and Kisame looked at the blonde and stayed silent, listening for any strange sounds.

After several seconds of nothing, they gave the blonde worried looks. "What sound?" Sasori asked. "I don't hear anything." Kisame added. Deidara paused before grabbing the box and holding it to his ear. He stiffened and held the box as far away as possible.

"This box is ticking."

* * *

Sasori sighed as he sat down on his couch and pulled Deidara onto his lap. He pressed their lips together in a loving kiss before allowing the blonde to slide off and sit next to him. Deidara curled up next to him and nuzzled his shoulder. "You okay?"

"Un."

"That was quite a scare today."

Deidara nodded and wrapped his arms around Sasori's arm. "Maybe we should quit?" Sasori let out a small bark of laughter. "Please, I know you love being there just as much as I do, if not more."

"Hn, yeah."

* * *

_Big pool; wish I had one._

_Big house; kind of creepy._

_Big windows; easily slip through one._

_Big man with knife; bigger than expected._

Kitsune easily snuck up behind the large man and skillfully injected him. The man yelped loudly before falling to the floor.

Okami entered quietly. He and Kitsune carefully picked up the unconscious and bound man on the couch and carried him to a bedroom. Okami went back to take care of the would-be thief in the living room while Kitsune went to look around. The young man silently thanked whatever deity he could think of that they had found out about the robbery.

He came across a closed door with "Aiko's Room" written across it in curvy pink letters. He quietly opened the door and stepped inside. The room was filled with toys and fluffy stuffed animals. The carpet and walls were a light pink, there were several dressers covered in little in little figurines. A large pink bed was against the wall on the other side of the room and a little brunette girl was sleeping in it… or so it seemed. When Kitsune walked forward, she sat up. "Are you the man that came to see daddy?"

Kitsune sat next to her on the bed. "No. Go back to sleep." She laid back down and Kitsune began gently rubbing her back.

Only minutes later, she was asleep. Kitsune quietly left the room and wandered back down the hallway to the living room.

Okami was finishing up when Kitsune wandered in. He cringed under the mask. "I'm almost done." Okami assured.

Once finished, the wolf was struck with a sudden, uncontrollable urge. He grabbed his fox and tore both of their masks off. He crushed their lips together in a bruising kiss and they both fell to the floor.

Kitsune moaned, but tried to wrestle off the stronger man. He finally pried their lips apart and gasped for air. "S-stop!"

"Hush." Okami yanked off Kitsune's cloak and began removing clothing.

Seconds later, both were completely naked. Kitsune struggled weakly. "We can't! We'll leave evidence!"

"We'll clean up."

"There's a little girl down the hall…"

"Then keep quiet."

Kitsune whimpered, but consented. He opened his legs and allowed two fingers to slip inside. He squeaked in pain due to the suddenness and lack of any kind of lubricant. He bit his lip to keep from yelping when the third was suddenly forced in. They were removed after only a few thrusts.

Kitsune tensed when Okami placed his cock against his entrance. Okami took notice and sighed. He pulled the fox on his knees and placed his face in front of his member. Kitsune opened his mouth and took the whole thing in, glad that his master was allowing him an opportunity to ease his pain.

Only seconds later, Kitsune was roughly shoved onto his back. Okami was inside in no time. Kitsune's back shot off the floor and his fingers tightly gripped blue carpet. His eyes squeezed shut in pain while tears began making their way down his cheeks.

Sometime later, Okami crushed their lips together to muffle Kitsune's scream as he painfully came. Okami emptied himself inside the younger male before pulling out.

Kitsune went limp after curling into a ball, his eyes slipping closed. Okami watched him for awhile before getting up and getting dressed. He helped a half asleep Kitsune get dressed. Once that was done, he started cleaning.

Less than ten minutes later, the scene was completely devoid of any evidence of their activity. Okami gently picked up the now-asleep fox and carried him out the window toward home.

* * *

"Eek!"

_Thumpthumpthump thumpthump_

"Dei?!"

Sasori jumped up from his seat, hot cup of coffee falling to the floor and breaking into several pieces. He ran to the hallway and found Deidara lying at the bottom of the stairs. He fell to his knees next to him and pulled him into his lap. "Are you okay love?"

"My back, butt, and shoulders hurt, un." Deidara whined. Sasori gently kissed the blonde and helped him up.

* * *

"What the fuck happened to you?" Hidan asked as Deidara limped into the room and took a seat in his favorite cushioned spinning chair. "I fell down the stairs."

Hidan snickered before bursting into laughter. "You're such a fucking klutz!"

"Shut up Hidan." Sasori said as he walked in the door. He grabbed a chair and rolled it next to Deidara, taking a seat and pecking the blonde on the cheek.

"That's it, I'm fucking leaving. I can't stand that mushy bullshit." Hidan stood and left the break room, heading down the hall toward Kakuzu's office to find someone (preferably Kakuzu) to whine to.

* * *

"I was unconscious, so I didn't actually see anything…" Akira said apologetically. "We understand." Sasori replied, snapping another picture. "But, uh." The officer and Sasori both looked at the man. "My daughter, Aiko, said that one came in her room and helped her go to sleep."

As if on cue, a little brunette girl wandered into the room. She looked at Deidara and smiled. "You're a pretty lady."

"Uh… Thanks…" He looked over at Sasori, who had his hand over his mouth to hide his snickering, and glared. He walked over to Aiko and squatted in front of her, gentle smile on his face. "Do you remember what the man looked like, un?"

"No, he was wearing a mask."

"Oh. What kind of mask?"

"Like a fox."

"Good." Deidara congratulated her for remembering. "Do you remember how big he was, un?"

"He had a big jacket it on. It was real long and had a big hood. He was real nice."

"Do you know how tall he was?"

"Umm…" She looked at Deidara for a little while, twisting her body back and forth while thinking. "Bout as tall as you."

"Did he talk to you, un?"

"Yeah, but I can't really 'member what he sounds like."

"Alright. Thank you, you've been very helpful." Deidara gently patted the girl on the head and stood, going over to Sasori. "You're not getting any tonight." He whispered in the red heads ear.

Sasori sulked the rest of the day.

* * *

Not much of a chapter, I know. I'm trying to draw this out a bit because I don't really have any ideas for this. **Submit your ideas!** If I like them, I'll add them at some point. Review please!


	3. On The Attack

Whooo! Next chapter! Aren't you excited? I am. There are only two or three more chapters after this.

Disclaimer: I only WISH I owned Naruto…

* * *

Deidara yawned and stretched. He climbed out of bed and made his way downstairs. Sasori was sitting at the kitchen table, sipping coffee and reading the paper. "Morning, un."

"Morning koi."

"What's going on today?" Deidara asked as he reached into a cabinet for a bowl. He found one and poured himself a bowl of cereal. After adding milk, he took a seat across from his boyfriend. "Nothing much. There doesn't appear to be any murders today, or at least none that anyone's found out about yet."

"That's good."

A few minutes of silence passed between the two.

"So… you're taking me to the mall today, right?"

"Damn… I was hoping you'd forgotten. Yeah, I'll take you."

"Yay!" Deidara did a little dance in his mind, quite pleased at his easy victory.

Sasori smiled at Deidara's apparent joy. As long as Deidara was happy, he was happy… usually. He'd been contemplating asking for the blonde's hand in marriage, but was worried for several reasons.

What if he said 'no'? Deidara was young; he had his whole life ahead of him.

What if he said 'yes', then later on found someone more interesting? Then they'd have to go through a divorce.

What if he said 'yes' and was killed later? Their work wasn't exactly the safest. They often got death threats.

Sasori sighed. Why did life have to be so complicated?

Deidara noticed the red heads sudden sadness. "What's wrong, Danna?"

"Huh? Oh. Nothing, love. Just thinking."

"Bout what?"

"Stuff…"

Deidara frowned. It was obvious Sasori didn't want to talk about it, so he let it drop.

* * *

"Hurry up, Danna! I wanna go there next!" Deidara tugged on Sasori's sleeve excitedly. Sasori let out an annoyed groan and followed reluctantly. He had three bags on each arm and had been at the mall for over three hours. He was quite ready to go home.

Sasori spotted a shop that specialized in jewelry. He quickly gave Deidara the slip, knowing the blonde wouldn't notice his absence until he needed money, and entered the large shop. He made his way to the ring section and sat the bags down next to him to begin looking over the selections.

"Can I help you?" Sasori looked up to see a pink-haired girl looking at him suggestively from across the counter. "Yes, I'm looking for a ring."

"Who's the lucky girl?"

"My boyfriend." Sasori said blatantly. He didn't know the little tramp, why should he care what she thought?

"Oh." Her smile immediately faded. "Are you looking for anything specific?"

"An engagement ring."

* * *

"Where'd you go, un? I thought you'd ditched me!"

Deidara pouted from his spot across the table form Sasori. He poked at his fries while waiting for an answer. "I'm sorry. I saw something interesting and had to look. I found you, didn't I?"

"Yeah, un, _after_ I'd freaked out and embarrassed myself in front of the entire store!"

Just then, the waiter stopped by to refill drinks. His name tag read 'Naruto'. He smiled and continued on his way.

"Sorry… I love you."

Deidara sighed. "I wonder sometimes."

"What's that supposed to mean!?"

"Nothing…" Deidara grabbed a fry and dipped it in ketchup before popping it in his mouth. It was Sasori's turn to sigh. He gently grabbed Deidara's hand and brought it forward to lightly kiss it. "I love you so much."

Deidara stared, slightly surprised, before smiling brightly. "I love you too, un."

* * *

"Ugh… I hate Mondays." Sasori mumbled as he climbed out of bed. He shook the blonde on the other side of the bed, fully aware that he wouldn't get up otherwise. Deidara groaned and pulled the covers over his head. Sasori sighed. "Get up."

"Nn."

"Come on. Please?"

"Nnn…" Deidara threw the covers off and lazily sat up, his feet dangling off the bed side. Sasori took a seat next to him. Before the blonde knew what hit him, Sasori pulled him into a heated kiss. He slipped his tongue past startled lips to explore the moist cavern.

It ended all too soon. Sasori smirked at a wide-eyed Deidara. "You awake now?"

Deidara could only nod.

* * *

"Hidan, can you help me with something…" Deidara trailed off after opening the door. Hidan was sitting on Kakuzu's desk, Kakuzu's hand up his shirt and their mouth's pressed tightly together. After hearing Deidara come in, they quickly broke apart.

"Uh…" Hidan's mouth hung open, trying to come up with an excuse.

"I thought you two hated each other!" Deidara said, dumbfounded.

"We do! He fucking tried to fucking rape me!" Hidan pointed accusingly at Kakuzu.

"Bull shit! You're the one who kissed me!" Kakuzu yelled.

"How long have you two been…?"

"Never!"

"About two weeks."

"You son of a bitch!" Hidan jumped off the desk and grabbed Kakuzu, trying to wrestle him to the ground. Kakuzu, however, was much larger and simply held Hidan against him. He grabbed the struggling man's face and pulled him forward into a heated kiss. Hidan struggled for a bit before finally giving in and kissing back.

Deidara quietly made his way out of the room, slightly freaked out. He quickly ran to Sasori's office. He slipped inside, shutting the door behind him. "Danna!"

Sasori looked up from paper work. "What?"

"Did you know Hidan and Kakuzu are together, un?" Deidara half-whispered excitedly.

"… You're joking, right?"

"No! I saw them making out on Kakuzu's desk!"

"I thought they hated each other!"

"Yeah, me to!"

Deidara walked around and sat on Sasori's lap. "Don't tell anyone, okay, un? I don't think they want anyone to know."

"I won't."

Deidara nuzzled Sasori's neck and was pleased when arms encircled his waist and held him tight.

* * *

_Sometimes I wonder, 'Why don't I just leave him? He doesn't love me; I'm a pawn to him.' Then he kisses me, and I realize that the only way I can ever leave is if he kills me. I'd die without him… and that scares me more than anything else in the world._

A single stray tear slipped down Kitsune's face. He had to move the mask to wipe it away. He stiffened when he realized Okami had noticed and was now making his way over. Okami removed their masks and trailed his fingers through the younger man's hair. Kitsune whimpered slightly when Okami began gently wiping his eyes of stray tears. He leaned forward and pressed his lips against Kitsune's, lightly massaging their lips.

When they parted, Okami began trailing soft kisses along Kitsune's cheek to his ear. "I love you so fucking much…" He whispered seductively. A shudder went along Kitsune's spine. "I love you too."

Kitsune gasped when Okami began sucking on his neck. He whimpered and attempted to push the larger man away. "It's okay… "I'll be gentle this time, I promise." Okami whispered.

"Okay…"

* * *

"So no one found him for _three_ days?"

"Yeah… The smell's pretty bad…"

Sasori held his nose as he snapped a few photographs. Hidan felt himself gag a little at the condition of the body. Deidara was doing an outside sweep because he couldn't stand to go in the house.

Upon going around to the other side of the house, Deidara noticed footprints. He mentally slapped himself when he realized they were his own, and wiped them away.

* * *

A loud crash in the kitchen awoke Deidara. He groggily sat up and shook Sasori. "Danna. Someone's in the kitchen, un."

Sasori groaned as he sat up. "Stay here." He climbed out of bed and went to the closet, grabbing a bat before leaving the room and descending the stairs.

Deidara laid back down and closed his eyes. Just as he began slipping back into unconsciousness, he felt the bed shift. "Back already?" Deidara mumbled and rolled over. He reached over to grab his lover's sleeve when suddenly his wrist was gripped tightly, making his eyes snap open.

Deidara yelped as he was roughly yanked up into someone's lap, kissed roughly, and thrown to the ground. "Danna!" He screamed just before he was pounced on. The man appeared to be homeless, as he was dirty, lacked good hygiene, and had an insane look in his eyes.

Deidara struggled violently as the homeless man attempted to tear off his clothes, which wouldn't be difficult since he was only wearing boxers and an oversized t-shirt. He kicked and screamed, scratching at the man's face and holes in his clothing that exposed skin.

Just as suddenly as it began, the attack ended. The man collapsed on Deidara before being kicked off. Deidara was pulled to his feet and held close. He whimpered and buried his face in Sasori's neck, trying to get as close to his lover as possible. "Are you alright, Dei-chan?" Sasori asked hurriedly, voice full of concern. Deidara could only nod as Sasori comfortingly rubbed his back.

Deidara sat back on the bed as Sasori tied the man up and locked him in the bathroom, placing a chair from the kitchen in front of it. He came back to find Deidara sitting quietly, waiting for him to get in bed.

Sasori climbed in next to the younger male. They laid down together and Sasori pulled Deidara as close to him as possible. He whispered loving, comforting words in Deidara's ear until the blonde fell asleep, Sasori joining him soon after.

* * *

Yay! It's longer than my other chapters. There was a reason Deidara wasn't kidnapped, you'll find out in the next chapter. Kitsune's identity will be found out in the next chapter as well! I'll give you a hint, his name has been used in one of these first three chapters. Review please!


	4. Kitsune Revealed

Chapter four! Kitsune's identity will be revealed!!!!1!! XD Prepare yourself for a twist. I doubt anyone really figured it out, even though I left subtle hints to who they are.

**Sorry** that this took forever… I'm going through a big Gorillaz faze and I sort of forgot about this…

Another hint: The masks have nothing to do with their identity; I just love foxes and wolves. XD

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto!

* * *

"I want a puppy…"

"We're not getting a puppy."

"But they're so cute, un!"

"No."

"Can we get a kitten?"

"No."

"… A bird?"

"Never."

"Why noooooot??" Deidara whined and tugged on Sasori's sleeve. Sasori sighed, quickly regretting taking the blonde to the mall to see the new 'Pet Palace' that just opened. "You said you weren't going to do this, Deidara."

"That was _before_ I saw all the adorable little animals, un!"

Sasori sighed again. "What will you give me if I buy you one?" Deidara smirked and kissed Sasori on the neck, which was their secret way of saying 'Anything you want, no matter how kinky or otherwise out of the question it may be.'

"Alright. Pick one."

"Yaaayy!!" Deidara cheered and ran off to go look at birds. Sasori found a bench and took a seat. He began to think over how he was going to ask Deidara to marry him, or if he was even _going_ to. He was still terrified of the blonde's reaction.

Sasori was brought back to reality when he heard Deidara calling his name. He stood from his seat and walked back into the store to buy whatever little horror Deidara had chosen.

* * *

"Pretty Dei."

"Aw!"

"Pretty Dei."

"He's so cute!" Deidara cooed at the colorful parrot. Sasori gave the bird nasty glares from behind the blonde. It had already been several hours since they brought the thing home, and Deidara had yet to leave it alone. "Pretty Dei." It squawked from inside its cage. Deidara squealed and gave it another cracker.

Sasori was beyond pissed. So far, that damn bird had been getting _way_ more attention them him. To add insult to injury, the blonde hadn't even _mentioned_ anything about the promise he'd made back at the store.

Sasori quickly stood from his seat and angrily stomped up the stairs. He changed clothes and climbed into bed. He barely noticed a slight weight on the bed until the weight was on top of him. His eyes snapped open.

Sitting on top of him was Deidara in a small, lacey, see through top with fur trim and lacey panties. Deidara giggled, "Is that a pencil in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?"

Without warning, Sasori flipped them over and crushed his lips to Deidara's. Said blonde moaned and tangled his fingers in blood red hair. He let out soft moans as Sasori rubbed the tent in his pants.

Sasori sat up and began rubbing the inside of Deidara's thighs, making the blonde mewl. He rubbed at the younger male's entrance through his panties, forcing whimpers out of soft lips. "Stay." He commanded before getting off the bed and going over to the closet. He pulled out a box marked 'Toys' and went back over to the bed. He opened the box and withdrew a pair of fuzzy handcuffs, which he used to handcuff the blonde to the bed.

Deidara let out a shaky sigh as his whole body trembled in anticipation. Sasori slowly slid the blonde's panties down his legs before tossing them over his shoulder. He prodded Deidara's entrance with two fingers before slipping one in, making the blonde gasp. He thrust his hips lightly into the touch.

After a few seconds of prodding, Sasori added a second then a third finger. Deidara began panting heavily as Sasori continually rubbed the blonde's prostate. "Dannaaa…" Sasori smirked and removed his fingers from the man beneath him and instead turned his attention to the box beside him. He dug around for a second before pulling out a long purple vibrator. Deidara instantly tensed, sensing that Sasori was in one of his more sadistic moods.

"Just relax, love." Sasori whispered as he lightly prodded the blonde's entrance before roughly shoving the vibrator inside, making the blonde yelp. "D-Danna…" He gulped. "_Hush._" Sasori snapped as he forced the toy deeper. Deidara clinched his teeth and eyes shut in an effort to nullify the pain. He suddenly cried out when he felt something tear. "S-stop! Please!" Sasori stopped when he could force the toy in no further and turned it on, making Deidara shriek.

After several seconds of thrusting, the blonde's screams died down to soft whimpers and sobs. Sasori, satisfied with his work, removed the vibrator and tossed it to the floor to clean later. He rubbed Deidara's entrance and brought his finger back up to his face to lick the blood off. Deidara whimpered below him, quiet tears rolling down his face.

"M'sorry." Sasori whispered as leaned down and kissed away the younger man's tears. Deidara let out a soft sigh and leaned into the touches. He let out a painful grunt as Sasori slowly penetrated him and began panting as he gently thrust in and out.

Within minutes, Deidara was moaning incoherently as Sasori quickly thrust in and out of him. Sasori roughly grabbed the blonde's cock and began pumping in time with his thrust. In no time, Deidara cried out as he came all over his and Sasori's chest. The red head came inside him soon after.

Sasori pulled out of the younger male and unlocked the handcuffs. Deidara was almost immediately asleep and, once he had pulled the blonde close to him was comfortably under the covers, Sasori soon followed.

* * *

Deidara yawned and plopped down in his cushioned spinny-roller chair, flinching slightly as his rump connected with the seat. "Sore?" Sasori asked from his seat. "No, un, I just like to flinch randomly when I sit in a chair." Deidara said blankly. "Sorry…" Sasori rolled over to the blonde and gave him a loving kiss.

"Eww…" Hidan made a noise from his place in the door way. "Oh shut up, un, s'not like you and Kakuzu are any better." Deidara said before sticking his tongue out mockingly.

Hidan simply rolled his eyes and walked away.

* * *

_Up the fire escape; open window._

_Through the window, large plasma TV._

_Second door on the right, bedroom._

_Slight change in plans…_

Kitsune racked his mind for an idea. The man who was going to be their victim was sleeping in bed with a hooker. She hadn't done anything seriously illegal, so what the hell were they supposed to do with her? He thought for several seconds before settling on poisoning the victim and grabbing a back-up rag and chloroform in his back pocket to knock her out and put her in a closet a few doors down. Okami walked in minutes later to take over from there.

Less then twenty minutes later, the victim was in various pieces all over his bedroom and Okami was about the start the clean up when there was a loud banging on the apartment door. Okami silently cursed as they both made a dash for the fire escape. Kitsune soon realized that they would definitely be followed.

Once Okami was out on the fire escape, Kitsune slammed the window shut and locked it. He pulled his mask off long enough to mouth 'I love you' to the surprised Okami before pulling it back down on his face and moving away from the window.

Okami kicked the wall in frustration, but knew the only thing he could do is escape and hope that his Kitsune would be okay. He turned and ran down the fire escape and into the night.

The police burst in and grabbed Kitsune, throwing him to the floor. One officer grabbed the hood and mask and pulled them both off. Everyone gasped at the pretty face glaring up at them.

* * *

"How _could _you? We trusted you!"

The young man scoffed at Kisame from his place across the table in the interrogation room. His hands were cuffed behind him because he'd hit the last person who'd gotten too close. "Whatever."

Kisame felt his anger boiling. "Dammit! Do you even _care_ that you've hurt people?!"

"Only people who _deserved _it. Loser."

Kisame growled and glared at the blonde man. Said blonde stuck his tongue out, taunting the enraged man. Itachi calmly walked to the table. Blue and red eyes locked in an intense staring contest.

Sasori stared dully through the two-way mirror as Kisame began speaking again. Hidan placed a hand on Sasori's shoulder. "Sorry dude…" Sasori watched as Deidara spat in Itachi's face, earning him a hard slap across the cheek. The blonde smirked and laughed, "You think you're so badass. Just wait until my lover finds out about this, un, he'll do to you what he did to 30 others!" Sasori bit his hand to prevent himself from letting out a painful sob.

Kisame's jaw dropped. "Sasori's your accomplice??"

"Ha! Don't make me laugh. He's just a good screw to promote me further up the business food chain, un. Or he was anyway."

Sasori fell to the floor and leaned his head against the wall, tears forming and trickling down his face. Hidan squatted next to him. "I'm real sorry. There's other fish in the sea…"

"But he was the one… I was going to ask him to marry me…"

"So you were _cheating _on Sasori?!" Kisame yelled.

"Yeah, so? It's not like he actually _means _anything to me. God, you're all so fucking pathetic, un. He's in the next room crying isn't he? Suck it up Sasori!"

Kisame hit the table and stormed out of the room. He found Sasori trembling on the floor, Hidan next to him, and went over to comfort his friend. Itachi quickly escorted Deidara out of the room and to his cell.

* * *

MUHAHAHAHAHA!! Bet you didn't see _that_ coming, didja? Who is Deidara's mystery lover, Okami? How is this even possible? Why am I so evil? Find out in the next and final chapter! REVIEW PLEASE!

P.S. Sorry about the not-so-great lemon, I was half asleep when I wrote it. I dun like dis chapter much…


	5. Okami Revealed

Chapter five!!! XX33 Who is Okami??? Find out now!!! IMASITED(I'm excited)!!!

Several of you were disappointed with the last chapter. I promise this will make up for it.

Disclaimer: I no own!

* * *

Deidara lifted his head when he heard the cell door click and open. He hopped down from the top bunk and rushed to the open door, throwing his arms around his lover's neck. They shared a deep, passionate, and loving kiss for several seconds before finally breaking for air. "You're quite an actor."

Deidara giggled. "Thank you. I heard you're not so bad yourself. Hidan was here a little while ago to yell at me and tell me how horrible I am." Deidara said as he was lifted off the ground and wrapped his legs around the older man's waist. Said male chuckled before connecting their lips in a loving kiss. Deidara sighed softly when they parted and rested his head on his lover's shoulder as he was carried out.

The older man carefully opened the car door and sat Deidara in the seat. "You know I spoil you…" He whispered. "Yeah, I know." Deidara leaned forward and pressed their lips together.

"I'll be right back. There's something I have to take care of." He said after they'd parted. He shut the door and walked back inside.

Deidara sighed and leaned the seat back so passers-by wouldn't notice him. He quietly pondered on why his lover had come back for him, he was of no more use and the man could easily be caught in saving him. _'Perhaps it's because I'm willing to fulfill every one of his needs, no matter what. He probably doesn't want to go through the trouble of finding someone else…' _Deidara silently hoped that maybe, just maybe, he cared about him, even if just a little.

Back inside, Sasori walked down the hall towards Kisame's office. He knocked on the door before entering. Kisame and Itachi were inside. "What do you want, crybaby?" Itachi said blankly. "Itachi! Don't be rude!" Kisame snapped. "What did you need, Sasori?"

"Payback."

The other two men gave Sasori confused looks. "This is for hitting my boyfriend."

Realization hit them too late. Sasori pulled out a gun and aimed it into Itachi's face, pulling the trigger.

"ITACHI!!" Kisame screamed and stood form his seat as Sasori quickly left the room. He ran down the hallway, past other people who were running confused because of the gunshot, and out to the car.

Deidara sat up when Sasori suddenly jumped in. He looked out the window in time to see Hidan come running out. He smiled and waved goodbye as Sasori started the car and sped off.

"Don't we need to stop by the house, un?"

"No. I've already packed everything."

"Did you get chirp-chirp?"

"Yes, I got the damn bird."

Deidara smiled. He turned to rummage in the back seat and lifted a cloth over an oval shape. Chirp-chirp began making noise once the veil was lifted. Deidara set it back over the cage. Before turning back around, he noticed something sticking out of a box. Picking it up, he was happy to find that it was the wolf statue that he had taken from a house.

He sat back in his seat and lightly stroked its head, serene smile on his face. Sasori took notice. "I figured you'd want to keep that."

"Thank you, un." Deidara leaned over and pecked Sasori on the cheek. He opened up the glove compartment and gently set the small piece of art inside before closing it and laying his seat back down, hoping to get a nap.

* * *

Several hours later, the sun was setting as Sasori pulled into a secluded area and turned off the car. He sat quietly for several minutes, simply gazing at the blonde who was fast asleep in the seat next to him. He reached into the back seat, grabbed a blanket, and gently laid it over the younger male.

He began softly running a finger against Deidara's lips, silently musing on how he'd first met the blonde and how they'd ended up here.

-Back to the Beginning- (Not going to be italicized because it's kinda long)

Two years earlier

"This is your new partner, Deidara. You'll show him the ropes, right?" Hidan said in a bored tone. Sasori nodded and Hidan left the room. The blonde, Deidara, smiled up at the red head and received a nasty glare in return. "Let's get a few things straight." Sasori started as he began pacing. "Don't ever bother me when I'm working on something unless I ask you a question. Don't touch my stuff. Don't ask stupid questions. Get everything done as soon as possible, I hate waiting. And don't ever do anything without my permission."

"Yes, Danna."

"Don't call me that." Sasori glared.

"Why not?"

"What did I _just_ say about stupid questions?!" Sasori stood inches away from the blonde, trying to look as intimidating as possible. Deidara simply smiled up at him. "But, if I'm your partner, un, you must be my Danna, because I'm new." He said in a cheery voice. Sasori scoffed. "I don't care. Don't call me that."

"Okay, Danna."

* * *

A month later, Sasori had learned to deal with Deidara's incessant talking and constant need for attention. Though, it still got on his nerves when Deidara would randomly walk up and hug him. What made the thought even worse, however, was when he found out the he was the only one the blonde ever hugged.

It was only after Sasori had come back in around midnight one night, he had forgotten something, and found Deidara asleep at a computer, cold cup of coffee nearby, that he realized how much the blonde _needed_ his approval. Deidara was always the first to arrive and the last to leave. He gently shook the younger boy while softly calling his name.

Deidara groaned and opened a single eye. "Danna? What're you doing here, un?" He asked as he sat up.

"I could ask you the same question." Deidara blushed, embarrassed at being caught. "Come on, I'll take you home." Sasori grabbed Deidara's arm and pulled him from his seat. "Um, but, well, I, uh…" Deidara stuttered and tried to free himself from Sasori's grasp, but the red head was stronger and easily pulled him out the door.

"So, where do you live?" Sasori asked as they started the car and drove off. "Uumm…" Deidara fidgeted in his seat. "Well?"

"A few blocks…"

"How many?"

"Two…"

"… Those are businesses."

"Oh. Four?"

"… Do you have any idea where you live?"

When Deidara didn't reply, Sasori sighed. "How the hell do you get home and to work everyday if you don't know your address?"

"… I… My house is 10 hours away, un."

"What??"

"They let me stay over night at the lab…"

Sasori paused for several seconds gathering his thoughts. "Why don't you have an apartment?"

"Can't afford it, un."

"Ah…" Sasori sighed again. "Would you like to stay with me for awhile?" Deidara gasped. "R-really?!"

"Sure."

A large blush spread across Deidara's face. "O-okay…"

* * *

Two weeks later, Deidara lie awake in the guest bedroom. The strange noises downstairs were keeping him awake. After several minutes, he decided to go investigate. He grabbed a flashlight from the nightstand and began his trek downstairs.

He followed the noise to a closed door. He immediately recognized it as the one Sasori told him to never enter. He thought he heard something like a sob, so he decided to enter anyway. He quickly opened the door. A light was on, and the sight in from of him made him drop the flashlight.

Sasori was bent over a half unconscious woman and slicing into her with a large scalpel. He turned in surprise at the clatter of the flashlight as it hit the ground.

They locked eyes for several seconds. Deidara shakily made his way forward, making Sasori stiffen and prepare to kill the blonde of need be. He stopped in front of the older male, and was about to speak, when the woman suddenly woke up and began to shriek. Without even thinking, Deidara grabbed the scalpel that Sasori had dropped on her chest and plunged it into her neck, successfully silencing her. Blood splattered in his hand, shirt, and face.

Deidara let out a choked sob as he began to back away. Sasori saw an opportunity and took it. He grabbed the blonde and pulled him against his chest. "Hush… its okay…" He lightly kissed the blonde's temple, and was quite pleased when he calmed and clenched the red heads shirt, nuzzling his neck. "You won't tell anyone, now will you?"

"No… Never…"

"Good."

* * *

Over a period of a few weeks, Sasori learned how far he could push the blonde before he fell apart. By using loving words and a gentle touch, Deidara would do nearly anything sexual he asked. If it got to painful, however, he'd sob and beg to stop. He was gentle with the blonde his first time, but after that he got rougher and began experimenting to see what the younger man would, and wouldn't do.

So far, Sasori had gotten Deidara to kill three people, not counting the girl he killed on accident. He always screamed and cried afterwards. Sasori decided to stop pushing him when he hesitated once and was stabbed, making Sasori have to step in and kill the man then take care of the blonde.

It was over a year later that they decided to begin killing, as a duo, those who had committed a crime. Sasori taught Deidara how to administer poison and defend himself incase something was to go wrong.

-Present-

"Danna?" Sasori was pulled from his musing by a soft voice. Deidara stirred from his seat. "Where are we?" He mumbled. "A parking lot. It's nearly midnight."

"Oh… You want me to drive so you can sleep, un?"

"No." Sasori leaned his seat back to lie next to Deidara, vaguely wondering when lust had turned into love. He silently wished they weren't separated so he could hold the blonde and moved the blanket so it was covering both of them. He reached over to cup Deidara's cheek and was pleased when he nuzzled his hand. "I love you so much, Dei." He whispered. "Love you too, Danna." Deidara let out a soft sigh before slipping back into blissful sleep.

Sasori watched him sleep. He felt a pang go through his chest at the memory of Deidara lying in the prison cell. He wondered if he had made the right choice by running away. Now, he and Deidara were both going to get the death penalty if caught. He should have made the blonde turn himself in and tell the court that he had forced him to hurt people, then he'd get a lesser penalty at Sasori's cost. Deidara, however, would never do such a thing.

He hadn't told Deidara yet, but he was planning for them to go to Hawaii tomorrow. They would be safe there and Deidara would definitely enjoy it. He sighed, and did his best to relax and clear his mind. In minutes, he was sleeping silently beside the one he loved most.

* * *

Eh, kinda crappy, but whatever. Hope you enjoyed! Still thinking over weather or not I should make an epilogue. Review please!


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